3 Easy Everyday Habits to Regulate Your Nervous System (and Build Capacity for Stress)
If you feel tense almost as soon as you get off the massage table, wired even though you’re taking the finest magnesium supplements, or exhausted despite getting 7 hours of sleep, your nervous system may be stuck in a survival mode pattern — and there’s no shame in that. Your brilliant brain is working overtime to protect you. These 3 simple habits help regulate your nervous system naturally, without adding more to your to-do list.
You know that feeling when you’re at your desk getting a lot done — but your shoulders are basically living up near your ears?
Or when you finally get home after a long day and the only thing that sounds relaxing is a glass of wine?
Here’s the thing…
Your nervous system is asking for your help.
A lot of us high-achieving women have nervous systems that are basically screaming for help, but we've grown so good at pushing through the signs that we don't even know what's going on anymore. We just know that we feel... tense. Worried. It feels like we're always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
The good news is that you don’t have to add another complicated wellness routine or a full lifestyle overhaul to your already busy schedule.
These three habits only take a few minutes, don't cost anything, and operate with your body's natural stress-relief system.
👋🏼 If any of this resonates so far, you’ll love taking my free physician-created Nervous System Pattern Assessment here.
Habit 1: The 90-Second Body Scan (But With Some Spice)
Let’s be honest — when most people hear “body scan,” they check out.
It sounds long, boring, and like something you’re supposed to do cross-legged on a meditation cushion.
But stay with me.
This version takes 90 seconds. That’s it. You can do it at your desk, in your car, or even in the bathroom at work (no judgment here). Instead of the usual "pay attention to your toes and ankles" meditation talk, we're going to make this actually helpful.
Set a timer for 90 seconds. If you can, close your eyes or soften your gaze.
Now scan your body from the top of your head to the bottom and ask just one question:
Where am I holding tension right now?
Common places:
Your jaw (you might not even know you're clenching it)
Your shoulders and that forgotten space between your shoulder blades
Your solar plexus or stomach
Even your hands, gripping a phone or mouse, or that argument you had earlier a little too tightly
Don't try to relax while you feel tense. Just pay attention to it. You might even say, “Oh, there you are stiff shoulders. Doing your thing again.”
Why this works:
When you pay attention to physical sensations, you activate your prefrontal cortex (your reasoning brain) and calm the amygdala (your panic button). You’re also strengthening interoception — your ability to feel what’s happening inside your body.
Most of us have weak interoception because we’ve spent years ignoring our bodies’ signals, and often society as told us this is the way to live.
This 90-second check-in gently retrains that skill.
Try this three times a day: morning, midday, and before bed, or anytime you catch yourself scrolling aimlessly (which is often your nervous system trying to self-soothe).
Habit 2: Shake It Off (Yes, Really)
This one might sound too easy. Or a little ridiculous. But it’s both woo and deeply backed by neuroscience.
Animals do this instinctively. Watch a deer after it escapes a predator — it shakes to discharge stress. Humans, on the other hand, skip this step entirely. We just keep going… and then wonder why we feel chronically stressed.
For 2–3 minutes a day, shake your body.
Put on a song with a good beat if that helps. Start with your hands, move to your arms, then let it ripple through your whole body. Bounce. Wiggle. Let it be messy.
Yes, it might look silly. That’s okay.
What’s happening:
Shaking helps your body metabolize stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline that get stored in your nervous system. It completes the stress cycle that started with that passive-aggressive email or tense meeting.
Morning is ideal so stress doesn’t pile up — but anytime you feel triggered actually works.
What works for different people:
Some of my clients swear by doing this to upbeat music
Others like complete silence so they can focus on the feeling
A few have told me they do it in their car in the parking garage before going to work
One woman does it in her shower (bonus points for efficiency)
Movement is medicine. Always has been.
Habit 3: The Ice-Cold Splash (Trust the Process)
This one takes a little courage — but the payoff is real.
At the end of your shower, switch the water to cold for 30 seconds.
Just 30.
If full-body cold feels like too much, aim it at the back of your neck and upper back.
No shower? You can also:
Splash cold water on your face for 30 seconds
Fill a sink with cold water and gently submerge your face
Yes, it’s uncomfortable.
That’s kind of the point.
Why it works:
Cold exposure stimulates the vagus nerve, the main highway of your parasympathetic (rest-and-digest) nervous system. This helps slow your heart rate, deepen your breath, and shift you out of fight-or-flight.
You’re teaching your nervous system how to stay calm in discomfort — so it has a reference point when real-life stress hits.
The first week is tough. Your body will protest.
By the second week, many women tell me they actually crave it because of how quickly it resets them.
Sometimes I add a drop or two of peppermint or eucalyptus oil when splashing my face (avoid your eyes please) — not necessary, but it turns the habit into a ritual instead of a chore.
The Secret Your Body Has Been Waiting For
Your nervous system isn't the problem. It's doing what it's meant to do: reacting to the continual, low-level stress of modern life.
The issue is that no one has ever taught us how to help it regulate. We were told to keep going no matter what, to disregard the signs, and to push through. And then we wonder why we need wine every night to feel like we can finally breathe.
The body scan, the shaking, and the cold water are about ultimately giving your nervous system what it needs: acknowledgment, movement, and a chance to reset.
You don't have to execute all three perfectly everyday. Begin with one. See what happens. Pay attention to how your body reacts.
The truth is that the best way to take care of yourself isn't a luxurious retreat or expensive supplements (though I love both of those things). It's the little things you do every day to make your body feel safe.
Your nervous system is ready. The question is, are you?
👉🏼 You can learn more about your nervous system pattern here.
Warmly,
Dr. Lynette 💜
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About the Author
Dr. Lynette Santos Malik, MD is a holistic physiatrist, somatic stress coach for professional women, and founder of the Golden Love Collective. She specializes in nervous system regulation for high-achieving women, subconscious healing, and helping clients reconnect with their bodies without sacrificing their careers or ambition. Through her signature program, Golden Habits™, she blends evidence-based somatic practices, hypnosis, and integration experiences to help women release chronic stress, prevent burnout, lead with presence, and build true nervous system capacity from the inside out.
🔗 Take the assessment: What’s Your Nervous System Pattern?
📍 Learn more at Golden Love Collective